I do not know why I decided to do a name search for her... It has
been so many years that I have put it behind me. I put all those unresolved
issues far behind... where I would not be predisposed to stumble upon it.
Nevertheless, you see... It was never my
intention to look her up. It happened when my mind decided to play a trick on
me and brought up a feeling that I once felt, long ago in the land of far
away.
I used to call her friend. She was such a
big part of me that I could not muster the thought to do something without her.
There is medical terminology for the type of relationship we had... it is
called "co-dependent." Well, during our best of times, that is what
our relationship was reduced to, co-dependency. However, towards the end, our
relationship was virtually non-existent. I hated coming home because a part of
me knew that she would be there. Therefore, I would rush home and run to my
room and locked the door. I really do not know what it was that made our
friendship morph into something other than that.
It has been many years since I locked out every part of her that
remained. However, when I tell the story of my youth, I find that I have to edit
her involvement in my story. I do not
hate her, not one bit. It just hurts me that our ending was so ugly. It had to
be done. All things that begin must end.
The reality is that I stopped serving her purpose and she stopped
serving mine. The only reason why we continued was that it was habit. Living together made it harder to walk away.
Let us be clear. It is not my intention to depict a horrible
friendship. However, like I said, we stopped serving each other’s purpose and
we went our separate ways.
So eight years later, the name of her business came to mind and I
wondered if she ever launched her business. This made me curious to look it up.
However, the name of her pseudo-business
did not bring up any successful matches; I decided to look up her name.
This brought up an article of her immigrant
story on a social project blogspot. The entry was a few years old.
While, I do not miss her, I sincerely wish her a good life and
continued blessings.
Respectfully,
Robert
