Thursday, October 2, 2014

Once bitten, twice shy


The fall always makes me think of you. I wish I could say that the cold reminds me of you. But cold weather is not something that happens in Southern California.

Maybe it’s the precursor to the holidays. Maybe it’s because I’m feeling nostalgic. I really can’t pinpoint why it is that I recently thought of you. Perhaps you’ve been calling me with your mind. But I remembered that your birthday is coming up and so I decided to buy you a birthday card.

In all honesty, it is not my intention to reach out to you. I think because of our salty experiences, it is just easiest not to contact you.  And maybe that’s why you haven’t called or emailed.

Dare I say it, I hold you dear in my heart and truly that is what may have sparked the thought to get you a card and let you know that I care.

But I wonder, how it will be received. Should I even bother? I asked around, and people advised me against contacting you. They said, “the dreaded ex is like the plague.”  While I don’t consider you like the plague, I definitely think twice before reaching out. I don’t want to give either of us a glimmer of hope that the embers can spark up again.

I guess lately, I have been thinking about you more frequently. I wonder how your life is. I hope that you have found what you are looking for. I hope that you are happy. Sincerely.

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